Anyday Now: My Lover's Gone
by Mike
Summary: The first installment in the Anyday Now series. Cordelia reflects on her loss.


TITLE: My Lover's Gone-Prologue  
AUTHOR: *** Charity *** thegoodfight@buffymail.com&GT and Bright Eyes angel_food@hotmail.com&GT  
RATING: G  
PART OF: "Anyday Now" (0/21)  
CLASSIFICATION: Series  
SPOILERS: All of "Angel"  
DISTRIBUTION: &GT&GTare you game?, doyle_fic@onelist.com-If anyone else wants to put it up on their own page, keep my name on it and let me know  
ARCHIVED AT: http://www.dencity.com/thegoodfight  
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Doyle, Cordy, Angel, Kate, Harry, Xander, Buffy, Wesley, Oz, Willow, Giles, Anya, Spike, Harmony, Dru, Amy(Squeak, squeak, Michy) or Joyce. They belong to those crackbunnies Joss and David (But since you don't want Doyle, can I have him? *sweet smile*). I do in fact own the plot and dialogue, plus I own Chrysanthemum(Ha HA) and Daniel, Throughout the story there are lyrics from Jewel(Thanx, Hazel!), Bif Naked, Fiona Apple, No Doubt and DIDO(Thanx, Mich!), Garbage, Jessica Simpson(Thanx Jules!), Dru Hill and Mariah Carey(Thanx Raynie!)  
FEEDBACK: Um...no?{sarcasm, there, folks}  
AUTHOR'S NOTES: {sighs heavily} I've finally caved in and used one of Michy's character. She doesn't come in too much in this chapter. She really enters the story in Chapter 1, so hold tight. =)  
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_My lover's gone  
His boots no longer by my door_ Cordelia stared out the window, leaning her head against the glass. "Cordelia?" Angel's voice jerked her from her reverie. She looked toward Angel's office. "Phone?" The ringing of the phone finally met her ears and she nodded, slowly. She got up and walked toward the phone. "Angel Investigations, we help the hopeless," she answered it in a dull, flat voice. "Yeah, um, is Angel there?" came a female voice. "Yes," Cordelia held the phone out for Angel. "Yeah," he answered, then furrowed his brow. "Yeah...yeah, okay. Yeah, I know...I think I do...yeah...thanx, Buffy...yeah, I promise...yeah...bye." _He left at dawn  
And as I slept I felt him go_ "Buffy?" Cordelia asked. Angel nodded, then walked into his office. _Returns no more_ She sighed and walked back to the window. It had been almost four months, but it still hurt. Questions still raced. It still felt empty. _I will not watch the ocean  
My lover's gone_ What would have happened if Doyle hadn't died? Would they have been together right now? Would he be holding her close right now, neither saying a word, but speaking volumes with their touch? She remembered his last words to her: "I guess we'll never know if this is a face you can love." He had finally revealed his demon form to her. _No earthly ships will ever  
Bring him home again_ At the time, Cordelia had been forzen in place, her heart racing, her mind uncomprehending, slow in the realization of what was happening. She had tried to tell herself that he would be okay. He was DOYLE. The short, sweet Irishman who had always tried to please, even though it seemed he might never succeed. _My lover's gone  
I know that kiss will be my last_ Their moment had been filled with clashing emotions. Fear, love, then finally pain. He had given her their first, last and only kiss right then. Cordelia touched her lips, still feeling his against them, then licked them, still tasting him. _No more his song  
The tune upon his lips has passed  
I sing alone_ God, the irony was too much. He had finally revealed what he was-WHO he was-and he was taken from her in a cruel twist if fate. It wasn't fair. It just wasn't fair. _While I watch the ocean  
My lover's gone_ The only rewarding part of it all was that, in risking his own life for a boatload of half-breeds, his sins had been atoned for. _No earthly ships will ever  
Bring him home again_ Sometimes, through almost insane grieving, Cordelia would wonder where he was right now. Whether he was in Ireland, back home in Dublin. _Bring him home again_ But maybe that wasn't so insane. Cordelia sighed and went back to her desk, pulling out an envelope which had her name written on it in hasty writing. She shook her head and put it back in the drawer, tears springing to her eyes. "No. Not yet," she whispered, then went back to the window. The thing was, when he had showed her his true self, she hadn't been able to respond. To tell him that she did. She loved everything about him. Right at that second, she knew she did. And she always would. _My lover's gone  
His boots no longer by my door  
He left at dawn  
And as I slept I felt him go  
Returns no more  
I will not watch the ocean  
My lover's gone  
No earthly ships will ever  
Bring him home  
Again  
_ -"My Lover's Gone" (c) DIDO 


End file.
